When we lose someone we love, people say that “it will get better,” but that’s a lie. It doesn’t get easier when a loved one is gone. I lost my great grandma in October. I held her as she passed away. I promised I wouldn’t leave her. Eventually the family had to leave so the doctors and whoever else can do what they needed to. I didn’t want to leave; I clung to my mom, crying that I promised my grandma.
Death is inevitable, but no matter if the person is 2 and hasn’t really even begun to live or 91 and has had a full life of memories, it still hurts.
In November I celebrated my birthday, and I received birthday cards from all the usual people: my aunt, grandma, sister, etc., but the one person I didn’t get one from was my great grandma. It felt like someone had punched me. All I could think about was not seeing her shaky script, which often said, “Brittany you are a beautiful, wonderful granddaughter that makes me so proud.”
I was devastated. I knew I had to figure out a way to vent. I don’t like having to depend on people, so talking was out of the question. I realized if she was the one person I could turn to so easily; why should I stop talking to her?
I know that sounds crazy, talking to a dead person, but instead of talking I decided to write notes, poems, and letters all to her. Just putting these feelings, news, thoughts down and just believing she knows that this is all to her helps.
If you lose someone and it’s hard to cope, try writing, talking, or even just thinking all the things you want to say to that person. It doesn’t get easier or better, but you learn that you’ll survive.